Thursday, January 20, 2005

Kumari has inspired me to comment on an episode (actually a collection of episodes) that I have tried hard to forget. Even now I wake up in the middle of the night and shout out - "... I'm not alone ... she is here with me ...", "No, the pink is not for me, neither is the lavender, I don't even know what shade lavender is ...", "I'm not a girl, no I'm not ..." The story begins.

This story is abt a boy called Jack (ahem ahem). Jack and Jill were dating still. Legend had it that letters addressed to Jill could either be sent to her house or in any of the dress shops in the locality mall coz they were all a second home to her. GAP filled her gaps and there was little left to GUESS with all the Colors of BENETTON uniting to EXPRESS their view. Jack did not understand any of this. He knew that clothes existed and that he had some of them too, which he wore. Beyond that the joys of fashion evaded him. Sadly, Jill thought he was a Jack of all trades and dragged him to her numerous conquests. Jack would sit quietly in front of the trial room. He would sit and sit and sit and sit. Occasionally the sales lady would come and inform him that it was a women's clothing shop. Jack would turn red, matching the skirt Jill had taken in to try out. He would explain that he is but waiting and the wait would continue. The lady would then join her fellow attendants and start laughing. Jill would come out after two hours and say "Which one is better? The red one or the brown one? I can wear the red one to parties but the brown one is better for winter?" Jack had no idea what to say. He waited and gesticulated impartially, waiting for the answer to appear automatically. "I think the red one is better," Jill would soon point out. An elated Jack would nod vociferously and say, "I was just abt to say that" and think "Aha, now we can finally leave". BUT NO. Apparently the red skirt will only go well with a black top. So a new round of shopping would begin. Another hour later a single black top would emerge victorious from a pile of identical black tops and Jack would smile again. However, Jack wasn't aware till that point that a black top and red skirt only goes well if you have thick boots ... and thick boots require a good belt and that warranted a ... Jack would get jacked.

Then one day jack learnt the secret. He would signal at some obnoxious top and suggest that Jill buys it and for everything else say, "i think you look a little bit fat in it". Now Jill will definitely not buy the obnoxious top and neither would she buy anything in which any member of the opposite sex found her fat. So poor Jill would have to come back home empty handed. Soon she started missing sleep. The shops, their screaming discount rates and fresh stock of old clothes would scream invitations at her. So she decided that it's best to not drag Jack along ... and so she did.

That's how Jack was back on the track.

Tho' i am a member of the Jill species, i dont really share that intelligence for fashion. That explains why i finish my shopping faster than my dad does :)
Aha... now I know what to do to pull that man shopping with me.. so many discount sales gone unnoticed off late.. gotta catch up.. :)
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