Tuesday, February 01, 2005

The Imaginary Girl Friend - a beginners guide
A few days back I mentioned in a post the concept of an imaginary girl friend. I got a comment this morning asking me to say a little more on that topic. Since this blog is largely an educational resource (ahem), I shall now explain this concept in detail :)

The times were different. The place was different. Kolkata, a city in India. Not the city it is now - decorated with malls and movie theaters where the Gen X goes to date and occasionally mate. This story is set in a time when Gen W ruled, or may be it was even earlier - the days of the Gen V (or as I call it Generation We). In short early 1990s.

Kolkata, which was Calcutta then, had a simple philosophy - protect the women and let the men run wild. The idea was efficient - as long as the women were well protected there was little damage the men and their hormones could do. It was almost impossible to reach the girls. The fat, beetle chewing, barb spitting, snarling mothers acted as the perfect fortresses to their little princesses. The boys tried to call their ladies but the mothers would pick up the phone and threaten to talk to their mothers in turn. So finally one day the concept of an "imaginary girl friend" was invented.

"That girl in the red house will be my wife." X would say.
"Cool! I will then date the one from the yellow house." Y would reply.
Z was be feeling a li'll low that day because his "girl friend" in the somewhat shabby brown house was leaving for college and he badly needed a new house. Finally, after a process of extended selection, Z would settle for the normally-not-in-demand lazy eyed girl from the yellow house.

"So we are now both sons of the yellow house," Y would exclaim to Z, raising his hand for a high five. Together they would revel, plan out their futures and even bicker occasionally.

"The other day I saw you eyeing my girl," X would scream. "It was your choice to go for the yellow one so don't you dare try to encroach into my red territory."

Interestingly, the girls never knew abt these guys. Occasionally they would stand in the balcony and find a dapper neighborhood boy staring. Immediately the mother would join the daughter. A glare was all she needed to scare the guy away. It did not matter. His day was made. It was all done in good spirits. Never was there an element of obsession. If "yellow girl" left, X would find some other color. Some times he would also cheat on "his girl" by standing outside the somewhat slutty "pink's" window. It was all harmless fun. The reds, blues and pinks kept the neighborhood happy - and yes it did add color to a lot of faces.

Beautiful! And the "para dada"s..
Those darn slutty pink house girls! Thank you, I feel most educated now.
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