Saturday, May 21, 2005

Rocking Code 

Some local in-house rockers were performing in college and some fifteen odd girls were jumping in unison. I've seen this happen before. So I tried to study the art. Like a tiger observing his prey, I watched the band carefully. Then, when the guy screamed "hey hey hey hey hey hey hey hey .... sing with me ... hey hey hey hey hey hey hey ... jump with me ... hey hey hey" the girls went completely berserk. The boyfriends, who had lined up obediently behind their lady loves, peeked through the jumping frenzy to catch a glimpse of their prospective competition. Surely the long haired, cheeky thin, sweat dripping, headbanging rockers would delay their post-show equipment packing session. Surely a few of the girls would go up and offer sweet talk. Surely they would be obliged. Surely a few boy friends would question the loyalties of their three month loves. Surely a few hearts would be broken. Ouch!

All this made me think (or is reverie the word). How cool will it be if computer engineers had rock star status too? If a full sleeved, shirt tucked-in, dapper desi techie could sit on a stage and debug some funky piece of code with twenty girls shouting in tune "Go Kumar go! Get that baby running. You can do it!" And then Kumar would emerge victorious and these girls would shout "Once more! Once more. This time without the debugger's help. You can do it!" And Kumar would oblige. Debug the ten thousand line baby in record time and then walk up to the front of the stage and pull out his shirt from inside the cotton pants. The crumpled ends of the shirt would sigh in relief, smelling fresh air for the first time in ages. Kumar would smile, look at the throng and say, "The next piece of code is very personal and special to me. I wrote it with my first girl friend. We spent the whole night writing it but finally when we saw the output ... we knew it was worth it. It was highly optimized ..." and one of the girls in the audience would give her neighbor "the conceited know-all-fan look" and say, "You know what he's talking abt, right? Kumar's highly popular module to parse large files ..."

Yeah! Sure!

yeah, then all the girls would dance and scream like crazy and shriek "Kumar, I love u kumar"..... and then those gals would start tearing off their clothes and kumar would be buried in a pile of undies....... it feels so good to be a software engg student!!!
Donnu think our conference talks are similar to a rock concert- except that its a slow and mutual suffering of 30 minutes for both u and the audience. Yeah, and the fun part is totally not there- but who cares? not me.
@Anat - see, you have chosen just the right career - wine, wild parties and fans are on their way man :)

@Ari - don't even get me started on the last conference I went to. Things were hard but they sure they dint rock :)
If bloggers had rock star status...you'd be...hmmm.
@Angel - thanks :) but if i was a rockstar - the aforementioned boyfriends would not even care for losing their lady loves - what good is a situation like that :((
Hahaha... well written.. Only a techie can understand the ranting of a techie, my dear fellow Techie.. :) *sighs at the number of techies in one sentence*
hey u r awesome...dont know how i stumbled onto your blog...but couldnt help giggling every two minutes...ur blogs took away abt quarter of my workday today!!
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