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Saturday, April 29, 2006

Bone of contention! 

Please explain this to me - what's so cute abt dogs???? I don't dislike dogs (even though they seem to bear some dislike towards me and have expressed it in terms of emotions ranging from barking to using me as a lamp post). However, I do turn a mild shade of envious green every now and then courtesy the barking specie. Today, on my way back from lunch, I noticed a little crowd around a pillar. A little brown dog was tied to it and a wide range of people had gathered around the pillar to exchange "Wow!", "Ooooooooh!", "Awwwwwee! Shoooooo shueeet!" and the likes. This is not the first time that I saw such a scene but it was probably the first time that I took time out to evaluate the whole situation ... and, well, I failed to fathom any bit of it. I tried to imagine myself tied to a pillar, on all four limbs, with a leash around my neck, maybe even with very little clothing on, and also imagined the kind of reaction that I'd evoke in all likelihood.

"Oh! finally they chained him. Good!" I can imagine bystanders saying.
"They should have done it a lot earlier." Another one would add in.
"He looks a lot thinner with his shirt on!!"

Seriously. I can't imagine anybody stopping and offering me food. I can't imagine anybody using sugary superlatives for me. I can't imagine anybody asking the person standing next to me how old I was or whether they owned me. (On a separate note, have you noticed how everybody assumes that the person standing closest to the dog is the owner? I've often contemplated just standing next to a tied dog and claiming its ownership, just to strike random conversations.) Bottomline, I don't have an iota of doubt that a tied and underfed me would evoke very little sympathy and love from people.

So what else could it be? Is it the fact that they are furry?? Do people like to see naked furry creatures. I instantly imagined Anil Kapoor, all naked, tied to a lamp post. Naaaaaa! I wouldn't be very thrilled to see that and correct me if I am wrong, but I don't think too many others would either. For that matter, I'll pay NOT to see that.

So what else could it be? Do we find their wet nose endearing? Then how come when I have a cold, people shy away from me? How come no one that I know of would find me cute if I tried to smell my own buttock? Dogs (and almost all other pets) never brush their teeth and one of the first things that women do when they spot a dog, is go right in front of their mouth and do the whole "Uuuuuju bujjjuuuu" garble act. These are the same women who ask you early in the morning when you sweetly offer them breakfast - "Have you brushed your teeth? Have you brushed your teeth? Have you ..."

And to make matters really bad, the other day I saw two dog owners taking their dogs out on a walk. While the two men exchanged pleasantries abt how the weekend was going to be spent, the two canines vigorously tried to engage in acts of sexual pleasure. Acts that would scandalize any man, woman, child or Samit Basu's Eric Seagull. And yet, the two men were highly amused by this and commented on how this was soo funny. Correct me if I'm wrong here. Many Indian kids are a lot more sexually frustrated compared to domesticated dogs. Have you ever seen two such kids on the road with their respective parents, trying to grope each other, with their parents saying - "Oh! Mrs. Kapur, it's so funny to see them kiss and fondle. We should do this every more often!"

I give up!

Comments:
i can't understand this dog craze too!! but i guess there are people who consider them as precious as kids and go out in the rain and cold and scorching heat just to take the doggies for a walk!! but your views about anil kapoor tied to the pole and kids on the road are hilarous!! keep it going!:)
 
to add to your post, I am REALLY envious of dogs that are owned by hot women. Sometimes when I see these women playing with their dogs, I really wish I were the dog !
 
You imagined Anil naked and all furry?
Kind of kinky, you are!

:-))
 
@ramya - i haven't gone out in the rain for a woman still - then why would i do it for a dog???? :((

@anon - trsut me, if you keep staring at them for long enough many of them will indeed think youare a dog ;)

@jinguchakka - yes, i have a kink in my armor :))
 
hey why not?

dogs are cute just like any other human being. they r honest n can be frds too if u love them:)

at work i have noticed one of the dog being navigator for a blind man!!
 
How can you ever come up with a post like this? ;)

The last part was the funniest!!

Hmmm.. honestly I am not fond of dogs that much..I try to run away whenever my uncles' doggie tries to lick me..

but I like cats..
 
Would be damn interesting though to see Mrs.Kapur's Mrs.Chadda's kids fornicating in the park. Every dog should hv its day in the sun boss!!
 
Hmm dogs! and cute eh! May be that's how they all want their spouses to be, cute, loyal and give attention all the time no matter how bad you treat them. Since the partners are no where close to their imgination, dogs more than make up for it. My doggy cents.
*need more caffine in my coffee*
 
@anon - ahaa! that's where i faltered. i have never been firends with a dog (even though some of my friends have called me a dog) - btw, do you work in the same place i do??? (there is a reason why i asked this)

@bindu - thank you :)

@jhontu - yeah! fornicating dogs will be hot dogs i guess :)

@gvenum - wow! very deep analysis - so deep that it might just be true :))
 
well, could be...whats the reason ??
 
regardless of why, they do make excellent tools to pick up members of the opposite sex.

speaking of (such a neat little segue), I'm tagging you, which you are free to ignore.

Rest is copy-pasted
You’ve been tagged (don’t blame me, I didn’t start this!). And as a ‘tag victim’, you are supposed to do the following:

1. Come up with 8 different points of your perfect lover.
2. Mention the sex of the target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game and leave a comment on their comments saying they’ve been tagged.
4. If tagged the 2nd time, there’s no need to post again
 
I tried to imagine myself tied to a pillar, on all four limbs, with a leash around my neck, maybe even with very little clothing on...

Maane, ki bolbo, I had to stop reading beyond this. Maane, shocking, what? Ki imagary! Women and children read this blog too, you know! *shakes head in a MOST disapproving aunt-like fashion*
 
I think people really love those furry little critters because of the whole unconditional love thing that seems to be a popular characteristic of the the four legged monsters. I , for one, don't appreciate them due to traumatic experiences that i shall not mention. but i know many people that just cant get enough. but i'll admit, sometimes they are so darn cute cause they are so darn stupid chasing their own little butts around and around. ah the simple life.
 
@anon - well there is a dog at my workplace too that helps someone out and even though I am sure that there are many such instances - i still wanted to ask

@bmagic - ah the lines you have used on your blog for my post :) how can i ever forget you :((

@rimi - see that was point dimma, to test your imagination and your ability ot face mental pain :))

@sara - i guess that is why they have dog soft toys and not grown up human ones ????
 
ya i think..i do:)
 
Someday, someday i'll get back at you for this slight..
You in(significant)human!! ;)

Heh! Dogs, whatever their reaction to you maybe, have since long, been man's best-friend.. & shall remain so for long!!
Lovely imagery in the post though..!
 
@anon - well, i think it will be useless to ask who you are since you have chosen to call yourself Anonymous :) well, keep reading the blog and if you ever get hold of free t shirts before me - pass it on :)

@bronzmash - there lies the problem sir. i'm sure many a men would love to be the best friends of many a damsel. these men are willing to sit, jump and even go and fetch a ball - sadly, they are not allowed to be the best friend - alas!
 
disclose my real name on web!man!

very few people know me at work n i get "keep seeing u all the time" :) however, cann't imagine:)

anyhow, not 2 create ne further misunderstandings...i accidentally came across ur blog while googling something else..i must say u rite well. keep up good wk, thou' i might not be reading it regularly:(
 
disclose my real name on web!man!

very few people know me at work n i get "keep seeing u all the time" :) however, cann't imagine:)

nehow, not 2 create ne further misunderstandings...i accidentally came across ur blog while googling something else..i must say u rite well. keep up good wk, thou' i might not be reading it regularly:(
 
Oh man.. this is just soooo funny...
Lekin I loove dogs, coz they are much more faithful than humans! :)
But I cant explain the dogs cuddling and ppl oogling at them though! :)
 
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